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Friday, July 07, 2006

Love me, love my kids

We brought our five-year-old grandson home with us for the week. He's quite the handful, but we love him more than life itself.

Here are some of the reasons:

1. He's watching a video he got when we bought him a new golf club -- yes, the kid loves golf -- that gives him tips on reading greens etc. He gets up excited, goes to his bedroom, rummages in his suitcase and changes into pajamas. These are some with long pants that have a pattern on them. He's wearing his golf shoes and a polo shirt.

"Why are you wearing that?"

"Look, see? Golfers wear pajamas." he says pointing to the video."I'm going to go play a round." and off he goes to the back yard.

I'll be danged. His pajama pants DO look an awful lot like the golf pants Jack Nicklaus is wearing. My husband was laughing so hard at this point, he was just on the floor.

2. He brushes his teeth every time he eats, and uses mouthwash -- of course it has to be in those little travel-size bottles that he assumes are really just kid-size.

3. He cups his hands, imitating someone holding a microphone and does a dead-on imitation of Larry the Cable Guy telling a joke.

Yep. we think he's funny, cute, and we love him. So needless to say it pained us this week to realize that some of our friends don't share our enthusiasm. It definitely made us see them in a different light. I mean, it's not like their kids are perfect and we like their kids because we like our friends. Sort of like family, you know?

Oh well, their loss.


Sherrie said...

Oh, that golf thing has me rolling! Says a lot about what The White Bear wore around golf courses during the '80s, doesn't it? And your grandson has great powers of observation to figure that out.

And yep, sadly, I've started judging my friends based on how well they react to the normal chaos of three kids. I know they are overwhelming, but they are kids, and they act like kids.

When anyone comments these days about it, I just tell them that it takes hard work and patience to change cavepeople into functioning human beings with empathy and consideration for others. Rome wasn't built in a day, and Mother Teresa wasn't born perfect.

Gina said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
CISSY said...

Sherrie: Funny thing is I forgive my "non-parental" friends a lot more for not thinking my children/grandchildren are perfect. But those with children should know that kids aren't perfect. So more pressure's on them.
Gina: Post away, promise we won't bite.

Gina said...

C.: You kind of beat me to it, but I'll go ahead anyway...

First off, I appreciate your forgiveness of "non-parental" friends. Thank you. People who don't have kids can't fully understand the experience of having kids, let alone react to them — especially very young ones — in the right way at all times. It's not a cop-out; it's the truth. I can try to "get it." I do try. But I'm sure I fall short of expectations. I'm sure many of my non-parental friends do, too. No offense. We're just not parents.

People who *do* have kids, on the other hand, should know better. They're having the experience you're having. But perhaps they're acting on this truism that my mom has described over the years: no one will ever love your kids and/or grandkids the way you love them. I don't know if your friends are ever going to agree that your kids are perfect when they already think their own kids are perfect. Know what I mean?

We could use some more acceptance, understanding and patience, on all sides.

That's all; I'll go back to my non-parental hidey hole now. ;)

Gina said...

P.S. By "perfect," I meant cute and funny and all that great stuff that kids are. Not perfect perfect...

Sherrie said...


Nope. You actually can tolerate my kids, because you don't expect perfection. You allow them some slack. Heck, you've seen Cathy in an Italian restaurant in the years before she became a rational being. ; )

No, you are one of the good ones.

We have family (aunts and uncles with no kids) and other friends who seem to think that kids are mini-adults. That they can function without naps, can spin on a dime if plans change, and can go long hours without snacks.

Those people drive me in-freakin'-sane. Especially when I try to follow along (with unrealistic family plans), and then the meltdown happens, and then those folks look at me, like I can't control the kids. When it was the plans, and the pushing, and the complete inconsideration for little people's needs that got us to that point in the first place.

In those cases, I can't win. If I go along, the kids end up crabby, and I'm a horrid mom because I can't control them. If I throw a stink from the start and try to watch out for the kids's needs, I'm an overprotective, bitchy mom who is a killjoy and ruining the greater group's good.

Gina said...

Sherrie: Thanks. :)

I hope you say no to at least some of the unrealistic family plans. It's your right! You know best what you and your kids can handle, and you know you can't count on these folks to be patient. I know it can be hard to say no -- I've had many mini-crises of conscience when I've said no to my own family. But sometimes, you just have to do it...

Sherrie said...

Nope, I have said "No."

Of course, the result of that is often that the other family members (including my husband and the eldest) go off and do the fun thing, while I'm stuck at home with the two little ones.

and then I get crabby and resentful . . .

It's just a different family style, but it grates. My extended family always did things that included everyone, even little kids. Greg's family is much more adult-oriented when it comes to activities (sailing, golf, yadda yadda yadda).

Someone has to stay with the ones who can't safely sail or golf, and often, that someone is me.

CISSY said...

Family expectations always amaze me. We never did a "joint" family outing with relatives when our kids were little.

We were doing some very adult things when my grandson was here -- getting up early for a parade etc. Our closest friends absolutely tolerated his moods, that's certainly the best way to figure out who your close friends are! And, G -- you tolerated our not so little girl when we went to NYC a couple of years ago and she was being a brat. Thanks.

Redneck Diva said...

If that kid can imitate Larry the Cable Guy, he's good people in my book!